Scripture Reading: John 19:25-27; 1 Pet. 5:13b; 1 Tim. 1:2-3a; Titus 1:4a; Rom. 16:13
Romans 16 is a chapter fully on the practical church life. This chapter uses the term church or churches five times, and this term is used absolutely not in a doctrinal way. The first time chapter 16 uses the term church, it is in the way of a local church, the church in Cenchrea. Few other chapters in the Epistles use the terms church or churches so many times.
In addition, no other chapter in the Epistles uses the term sister more than once. The term brother is used often in the New Testament, but the term sister is used less often. Nowhere else do you find the phrase our sister. Paul began this chapter by saying, “I commend to you Phoebe our sister.” In the following verses he greeted a number of brothers, but he did not say “our brother.” Only in recommending Phoebe did he say “our sister.”
There is another unusual concept in this chapter on the practical church life in verse 13: “Greet Rufus, chosen in the Lord, and his mother as well as mine.” The emphasis in Romans 16 is on the sisters, not the brothers, and there is mention of a mother but no mention of a father. Neither the sister nor the mother is the one in the flesh. “I commend to you Phoebe our sister,” not a sister in the flesh. The mother is the mother of Rufus in the flesh, but she was also Paul’s mother. Surely she was not Paul’s mother in the flesh. We do not have a verse to tell us the names of Paul’s mother and father in the flesh. The mother in verse 13 is a mother in the flesh in relation to Rufus, but more important, she is a mother not in the flesh in relation to Paul.
The New Testament tells us that Paul had at least two sons, one named Timothy and the second named Titus, but these were not his sons in the flesh. Paul uses a very intimate expression to call them sons: “Timothy, genuine child in faith,” and “Titus, genuine child” (1 Tim. 1:2; Titus 1:4). However, the New Testament tells us very little about the direct flesh relatives of the apostles. We cannot find a verse to tell us how many sons and daughters Peter had. But Peter did tell us that he had a son named Mark: “Mark my son” (1 Pet. 5:13). Surely Mark was not Peter’s son in the flesh. The Bible tells us that Mark’s mother was named Mary, but it does not tell us the name of his father in the flesh. Peter was Mark’s father, not his father in the flesh but his father in the spirit, his father in the common faith.
Not one word in the Bible is wasted. According to the record in John 19, when the Lord Jesus was suffering during His crucifixion, He looked at His mother in the flesh. At that time four sisters were standing by the cross, watching how the Lord was being crucified. Mary was there, and her sister, and another two sisters also named Mary. Mary’s sister was the mother of James and John, so James and John were the cousins of Jesus. Near the end of His crucifixion, the Lord Jesus looked at His mother in the flesh, and in a sense it was as if He said to her, “Mother, don’t behold Me, but behold your son.” At the same time He said to His cousin John, “Behold, your mother” (vv. 25-27). This account is not merely a story, and there is a reason that it is recorded only in the Gospel of John, not in the other three Gospels.
Each of the Gospels records certain things in a meaningful way. For example, Luke is a book on salvation, and it gives us a special record of the two criminals who were crucified with the Lord Jesus — one who blasphemed the Lord, and the other who rebuked the blasphemer and called on the Lord. The Lord told him that on that day he and the Lord would be in Paradise (23:39-43). This record in Luke is not merely a story. The Lord’s word to the criminal on the cross indicates salvation, and Luke is a book on salvation. This record is not in John, for John is not a book on salvation. Luke’s record is not in John, and John’s record is not repeated in Luke.
The Gospel of John is a book on life, not on the natural life but on the transferred and transformed life. To fulfill his purpose John gives us a record to show how the life of the believers of Christ could be transferred by the cross of Jesus and by His resurrection. If you look at the cross of Jesus, you will be transferred. The word of the Lord Jesus to John and to His mother was a word to show us that His life-imparting, life-releasing death transfers people’s lives.
Originally, John was not Mary’s son, and Mary was not John’s mother. But because of the crucifixion of Jesus, Mary, the mother of Jesus, became the mother of John. John, who was the son of Mary’s sister, became Mary’s son. This is not a story of adoption, and it does not mean that the Lord Jesus was like a judge to carry out the adoption as they all stood by the cross. This was not an adoption but a transfer. According to the life in the flesh, John was Mary’s nephew, and Mary was John’s aunt. But by looking at the cross, they received another life. Another life came into them. In this second life the nephew becomes a real son, and the aunt becomes a real mother.
The New Testament does not tell us the names of any sons of Peter or Paul according to the flesh. But it does tell us about Mark and Timothy and Titus. The New Testament as a record in the spirit does not tell us about the relationships of the family in the way of the flesh. It gives us a record of our family in the spirit. We have a habit of calling one another brother and sister in the church, but this may be just a religious term unless we have a genuine realization that we are brothers and sisters sharing the same life. If you were to recommend your sister in the flesh to someone, surely there would be a realization deep within you that this one has a special relationship to you. Unless you have a similar realization when you recommend a sister in the Lord, for you to call her your sister is just to use a religious term.
Although we speak of one another as our brothers and sisters so many times in the church life, I have never heard the saints speaking of their sons in the church, their sons in the spirit. This word may seem like a hard word and even an offending word, but we need a strong word to penetrate into us. I hope the day will come that so many of the saints will have sons according to the spiritual record. We should not call one another brothers and sisters in a meaningless way.
Paul says, “I commend to you Phoebe our sister,” and “Greet Rufus,...and his mother as well as mine.” Paul speaks of his mother. The New Testament tells us that Paul had a mother and that he had two sons. His mother was Rufus’s mother, and his two sons were Timothy and Titus. But none of these was something in the flesh.
To have the practical church life to the uttermost, in the local church there should be some real sisters and some real mothers. In the previous chapter it was my burden to share with you that you need to be a serving sister, but now I am burdened to share with you that you need to be a mother. As long as there is a shortage of sisters like Phoebe among us, the church life is not practical. Yet the serving of that sister is at the beginning of Romans 16, in the first verse. When the church life in practicality reaches a peak, in every church there should be some real mothers.
Earlier I suggested that the sisters needed to be trained to be serving ones just as nurses are trained in the hospitals to care for the sick ones, but I have to say that there has never been a training school on the whole earth to train mothers to be mothers. I have never heard of one person receiving training to know how to be a mother before she became a mother. The only way anyone could become a mother is by delivering a child. Then the child forces her to train herself.
Many parents try to train their children. Eventually, they have to give up because the training is not practical. It is like something in a dream. For a young lady, the most practical training to be a mother is one little child. Yesterday she did not know how to be a mother, but today a child was delivered, and tomorrow morning she will begin to be trained. Before very long, she will graduate from this training.
There are a number of good, basic principles that have been missed among the believers for generations. If it were the practice for each one of the new believers to have someone care for them in a particular way as their real spiritual parents, so many of the new ones could be helped in their spiritual life and in the church life.
In his training in 1948 Brother Nee told the saints, especially the sisters, that they should be a mother to another young saint. Many sisters could each take care of two or three children in the spirit.
For the most part, children do not like to respect the word of their own parents, especially when they become teenagers. But if I would take your children as my children, they would respect my word. If my children have some problems, they would not open themselves to me. But if you would take them as your children, they would open up their whole being to you. Although they would not take anything that I would say to them, they would receive whatever you would say. There are many problems with the parents and the teenagers. Very few teenagers would be submissive and obedient. Yet even the troublesome ones would be happy to listen to someone other than their own parents.
We all need a second birth, and we all need a second mother. If you sisters would pick up the burden by looking at the cross, getting yourself transferred in life, and take some young ones of junior-high age to be your children, within five years there will be a revival in the church. The best way is to have a life transfer by looking at the cross. You need to bring a young one to the cross to look at the crucified Jesus. He will say, “Look at your mother. This is your mother.” And He will say to you, “Look at your son. This is your son,” or, “This is your daughter.”
All the sisters of all ages need to be a mother to someone else. Taking care of a child will cause you to grow and to be mature. In the natural life the best way for the young ones to mature is for them to have two children. Even more, to pick up some younger ones as your children in the spirit will cause you to grow.
However, to take care of some in this way is a big test. If your natural life has not been crossed out, has never had a transfer, this practice will become a snare. You will fall into the natural love and be trapped by the fleshly emotion. Such a practice will work only by a life transfer through the cross.
In the church life we need the real sisters and the real brothers, and especially we need the real mothers. All the sisters need to be encouraged to take care of some children in the spirit. This is not a matter that can be assigned to the sisters, but there is the need for you to pick up the burden.
Without some children in the spirit, it could be so easy for the sisters to fall away. No matter how young you are, one or two children in the spirit will be your protection and your support in many ways. Caring for these children will bring about a big change in you. A young lady who has no children would be too free. She would have no bondage and no limitation but also no protection and no support. Two children would be a protection, a guard, and a limitation to the mother, but they would also keep her from being defeated. Without children it is so easy for the sisters to make mistakes, but if there are two or three children there all the time, the children keep the mothers from making mistakes.
There is a need for all the sisters to be sisters in reality. “Phoebe our sister” in Romans 16:1 was a real sister. She was serving, she was caring for others as a nurse, she was a patroness taking care of all the needs of others. But to be such a sister in the church life is still not enough. In the church we need to have mothers. Even the servants of the Lord need to have mothers. The apostle Paul needed a mother. The mother of Rufus was his mother. Without a sister as a mother to take care of them, all those who bear the burden for the Lord’s service would be sorrowful.
Many sisters need to become the real mothers in the church life. The best way to deal with the ladies who are so talkative is to give them twelve children. The more children they have, the more they do not like to talk, and the more they have to be practical. They realize talk is too much theory. Their talk becomes a plea for help. They have just finished nine and still have three little ones to bathe. They have no mind, no energy, no strength, no heart, no capacity, and no time to talk about who is getting married. The children will change the whole situation.
If you really love the Lord, you need to look at the church family, with a number of teenagers who need spiritual mothers to care for them. You each need to pick up the burden to care for at least one as your child in the spirit. All the parents will tell you that they need your help.
If we call one another brothers and sisters in the church life, and yet when we come to the practical things, we do not care for each other’s children, all the second generation would realize that our brotherhood and sisterhood is not genuine. To them the brotherhood in the church life becomes something in the air. But if someone would pick up those young ones and care for them as their own child, the brotherhood in the church life becomes the real brotherhood. Both parties will get the benefit. This was Paul’s concept in writing Romans 16. Otherwise, how could he write in this way: “I commend to you Phoebe our sister...Greet Rufus,...and his mother as well as mine”? This means that all the people in that time in the church life had the life transfer through the crucifixion and resurrection of Christ. The cross is here. On this side of the cross Mary was Mary, and John was John. These two in blood and flesh had nothing to do with one another. But on the resurrection side John becomes Mary’s son, and Mary becomes John’s mother. They have a second relationship of the family, not the first. The first relationship is in the flesh, but the second is in the transferred life. This matter is in the Bible, but it has been missed by most of today’s Christians.
In the New Testament it is really hard to trace the flesh family of the apostles. But it is so easy to see that among the early believers there was the second birth with the second family relationship. Among today’s Christians there is talk about the second birth, but there is nearly no talk about the second relationship. If we have the second birth, surely we have the second relationship, surely we have the second family. If we have the second family, surely there should be the family relationship. It is not enough to say that we are in a big family. We must have the family relationship with the real sisters and the real mothers.
To take care of others is not an easy thing, and it is even harder to be taken care of by others after we are grown. Nevertheless, we all need the care of others. Their care is our real nourishment, our real protection. The older sisters should not consider that they are no longer the daughters because they have become mothers. They need to learn to be daughters also and let others take care of them.
All of us have had the second birth, and we have the second family. In the second family we all need to have the second family relationship. The family is in the relationship. If the relationship of the family is gone, there is no longer a real family. Without the family relationship we cannot feel encouraged about the situation in the church life. Without the reality of these matters we cannot have the practicality of the church life.
The sisters need to be trained as serving ones, and they need to learn to be the mothers. Until there are the real mothers in the church life, the church life is not practical, and more is needed.
The matter of being a mother will bring in many lessons, and it will put you on the real test in every way. You will see how you love yourself more than others, how you care only for yourself. All these things will be tested and exposed. Without this testing, you could never realize how selfish you are and how much you are in yourself. These things would not be exposed until you pick up some as your children. These good children in the spirit would expose you to the uttermost.
You may talk about being broken. Many times I have said that the sisters need the husbands with some little helpers to break them, but the best ones to do the breaking are the children in the spirit. How much breaking will come if you pick up one to care for as a mother! We need the grace to take this way. It is not adequate to be a brother or a sister in a general way. All the sisters need to be serving sisters, and whether or not we have children, we all need to be the mothers. This is the best way to receive the blessing, the growth, the spirituality, and the real enjoyment of the Lord.
When you become such a mother, everything in the church life would be practical. There would be no more vain talk. The sisters like to talk so much because they do not have children, and they do not take care of their children. If you would pick up a child and take care of that child, right away you will become very practical. No one else can help you so much to stay away from your natural disposition. Such a child will take you from the earth to the third heaven.
This is not doctrinal, but it is more than practical. Just this little word, “Greet Rufus,...and his mother as well as mine,” means a lot. “I commend to you Phoebe our sister.” Just this short commendation is meaningful. The church life is here, revealed in this Scripture and revealed in the mother. All the sisters need to become the mothers.
In God’s account, the children in the flesh do not count. We need the second category of children, and we all need a mother to care for us. Our children in the spirit count in the eyes of God.
No doubt Peter had some children in the flesh, but there is no record of them in the New Testament. When Peter was released from prison, he considered where he should go because he realized that there were many homes with praying groups. Eventually, he went to the home of Mark’s mother. This word indicates the intimate relationship between Peter and Mark. In Peter’s Epistle, Peter tells us that Mark is his son. History tells us that Peter dictated most of the Gospel of Mark. Some expositors would call the Gospel of Mark the Gospel of Peter. A number of verses in Mark give an indication that it is Peter’s word. Because Mark was Peter’s son in the spirit, he inherited all Peter’s riches in the spirit.
Romans 16 is a chapter on the practical church life, not in doctrine but in practicality. Until we see the real serving sisters and so many mothers, our church life is not practical; it is not sufficient.
If you sisters would be serving as Phoebes and loving as mothers, I can assure you that the church would be seventy percent built up right away. Seventy percent of the building of the practical church life depends on the sisters. Without such a coordination with the sisters in this way, no matter how much the brothers labor in the church life, there will be very little result as far as the building goes. When the sisters are serving and are mothers, right away the church will be built up. Through this there will be a strong connection in the spiritual building, and a prevailing revival will spontaneously be brought in. Satan will be defeated. It will be fully proved how much depends on the sisters. Seventy percent of the practical building depends on the sisters. We all must pray that the Lord will have mercy upon the church that all the sisters will be Phoebes and will be mothers.
