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Scripture Reading: Isa. 55:8-9; 1 Sam. 2:6-7
In the preceding chapter we saw that the visible systems in the universe have spiritual significance. Now we need to see that these systems in the universe do not operate along a straight path. For example, there are mornings, and there are evenings; there are days, and there are nights; there are sunny days, and there are cloudy days; there are summers, and there are winters; and there are births, and there are deaths. Moreover, there are things that bring joy and things that bring sorrow; there are things that are beautiful and things that are ugly; and there are things that are sweet and fragrant and things that are rotten and stinking. In the entire universe it is hard to find any matter or principle that operates on a straight path. There are ups and downs associated with nearly everything. This is also true in regard to spiritual matters.
In our human considerations related to our spiritual life, nearly every Christian has the concept that the path of our spiritual life should be straight. After we are saved, it is our hope and desire to follow the Lord continuously for our whole life. However, this often does not happen. When we are revived, we again hope and desire to stand firm and to courageously follow a straight path without any further failure. In truth, no one’s experience of walking reflects a straight path. Even though we are saved, we will fall inexplicably and involuntarily, and after we are revived, we later will fall again. At such times we may wonder how we became so indifferent to the point of backsliding, and we may regard our situation as being so pitiful that it is impossible to rise up. Nevertheless, at a certain point and often just as inexplicably, we rise up and begin to love and pursue the Lord once again.
These experiences lead us to an important discovery about ourselves, the discovery that we are not dependable or consistent. When we hope and desire to stand, we fall without any seemingly logical explanation. When we think that we are finished, we likewise rise up again without any seemingly logical explanation. After we rise up, we often are even more determined to be careful and to remain on a straight path. However, at any time we can inexplicably fall again, because even though a will to stand is present with us, working it out is not (Rom. 7:18). In our mind and will there is a desire to walk along a straight path, but in our actual experience there are both falling and rising. We want the sky above us to always be bright without any sense of darkness, but there are always an evening and a night, and the sky always becomes dark at night. However, after the night there is the brightness of the coming day. Similarly, we rise and fall, fall and rise.
Can anyone say that he has had only an experience of rising from the time that he was saved and that his days have always been bright with no hint of darkness? I do not believe that such a brother or sister exists. Although our thoughts are focused on a straight line, God’s thoughts are higher than our thoughts (Isa. 55:8-9), and He has ordained a path that is full of ups and downs (1 Sam. 2:6-7). After we experience a day, we will experience a night. After a summer there will be a winter, after a spring there will be an autumn, and after life there will be death. However, after death there will be resurrection. God’s leading is not according to a straight line; it is a path with both ups and downs.
When a brother who loves the Lord considers the matter of marriage, he thinks, “I am a young brother, I have received grace, and I really love the Lord. I have prayed and consecrated myself to the Lord, asking Him to prepare a good wife for me.” A young sister who loves the Lord also will ask the Lord to prepare a good husband for her. When brothers or sisters ask the Lord for a good wife or a good husband, they mean a sister or a brother who loves the Lord as much as they do. Many young brothers and sisters pray in this way, but their prayers often seem to produce an opposite result. For nearly thirty years I have been observing God’s children, and we have tried our best to help the brothers and sisters concerning their marriage, yet regardless of how much we try to help, the results never seem to match our ideal expectations.
Sometimes we had a feeling that it would be good if a certain seeking brother could marry a sister who truly loved the Lord. Or we thought that a brother who had much light and a sister who was quite spiritual would be a perfect couple. We felt good about both, and when we introduced them to each other, they too were pleased. After they were married, however, we discovered that the sister did not really love the Lord that much. Sometimes we felt that a good sister, who was even like Mary, should be introduced to the best brother, to one who loved the Lord very much. Little did we realize that the brother would turn out to be very fleshly after they were married.
We went to Tientsin to begin the work and establish the church in 1936. While we were there, we met a young brother who was in college and who really loved the Lord. Because we were at the initial stage of the church life, we considered him to be a treasure. At the same time, we knew a sister who loved the Lord very much and who also attended the same college. Eventually, they became acquainted with each other. One day the young brother came to fellowship with me and said, “Brother Lee, I have asked the Lord to give me a sister who loves Him. Do you think that this sister is suitable?” I said, “She is a good sister. If she is willing, it would be a wonderful match prepared by the Lord.” When they were married, I was present at their wedding, and I even spoke a word. We were all very happy that this brother had been blessed to have such a precious sister. We believed that they were a good match for each other — one was spiritual, and the other loved the Lord. As a couple, we also felt that they could serve the Lord. Regrettably, not long after they were married, the brother found out that the sister loved the world a great deal.
Even though some couples are very spiritual, and both the husband and wife love the Lord, their circumstances do not always turn out to be so ideal. Shortly after a couple was married, they began to have children. They prayed and asked the Lord to cause their children to love Him, to give themselves to Him, and to serve Him. However, even though the husband and wife both loved the Lord, their children did not love the Lord as much. The couple prayed continually, saying, “Lord, we give our children to You, and we pray that You would call them one by one.” However, none of their children were called. There was another couple who wanted their children to be saved and attend the meetings, to listen to messages, and to conduct themselves properly. However, they did not want their children to be called to serve the Lord. Nevertheless, their first child was called, and so was their second. We were happy that the children were called, but the parents were not happy that they were called. Some saints want their children to be called, but God does not call them. Others are anxious over the thought of their children being called, but God intentionally seems to call them. This is very mysterious. Hearing this, some may wonder if it is possible for the parents and the children in a family to all love the Lord. While we have certainly seen situations involving a whole family loving the Lord, even then not every situation is according to our ideal. For example, the most spiritual son may meet an untimely death, but a less spiritual son lives a long life.
It is difficult for some to understand these situations. When a brother who loves the Lord marries a sister who loves the Lord, there can still be problems, and when a spiritual sister marries a spiritual brother, there also can be problems. Sometimes there is no problem with the brother and the sister, but their children grow up loving the world more than the Lord. Even when children love the Lord just as their parents do, this positive situation may not last long, because accidents and even death can occur. We have seen many situations like this in the past twenty to thirty years, and it was difficult for us to understand and comprehend the Lord’s way. However, now we can stand before the Lord and say that God’s thoughts are not our thoughts and that His ways are higher than our ways (Isa. 55:8-9). We should remember that God has arranged systems in the universe that do not follow a straight line; rather, these systems involve ups and downs. Autumn follows spring, and winter follows summer. Night follows day, sorrow follows joy, and death follows life. A straight line is not God’s way.
God’s way is related to our growth in life. A wife who loves the Lord will have fewer opportunities to grow in life with a husband who loves the Lord than she will with a husband who does not love the Lord as much. Children who are disobedient cause their parents to grow in life more than children who love the Lord. If there is birth but no death, there will be little growth, and if there is day but no night, there also will be little growth.
Many animals and plants need overcast and rainy days as well as sunny days; they need night as well as day; they need winter as well as summer. I have lived in Southeast Asia for extended periods of time, and it is accurate to say that the food produced in a hot climate is not as tasty as our food. Their chickens and ducks and even their eggs are not as tasty as ours, and their fish are not of equal quality to ours because they have a summer climate all year. There are no cold days. Every day is a hot day, and the constant heat makes people miserable. Living things cannot flourish without cold weather. With hot and cold days and even daytime as well as nighttime temperatures, every living thing grows better. Even among the human race, people with smart minds and strong character are associated more with places that have variable seasons. This is God’s arrangement.
If human life involved only birth but no death, only joy without sorrow, people would not experience much growth. A person who can stand without ever falling will not have much depth. Those who are deep in the Lord are the ones who have fallen the most. Hearing this, some may say, “Is this not the doctrine of doing evil that good may come, as in Romans 3:8? Are you encouraging us to fall?” Although I wish that we all would fall so that we could grow, I am not saying that we should do evil that good may come. I often tell people that falling is not an easy matter. In fact, it is even more difficult to fall than it is to stand.
However, when God allows us to fall, we will have no way to escape; we will fall. David was very pious and spiritual in his living before the Lord. When we read the psalms that he wrote, we can see that he was a person who lived in the Lord’s presence. However, he did not know himself, and one day the Lord seemingly said, “Do you think that you are pious? Do you think that you are spiritual? You need to see your real condition.” As soon as God withdrew His hand, David fell; he had Uriah killed and took his wife, committing a great sin (2 Sam. 11:14-27; 12:9). When David was about to sin, God could have moved His finger just slightly, and David would have been preserved from committing these sins. However, instead of preserving David, God allowed him to fall and go through a dark night.
We should not have the thought that it is difficult for a Christian to stand. Rather, we should realize that it is even more difficult for a Christian to fall. Even though some may say, “It is very easy for us to fall,” we could not fall even if we wanted to without God allowing it. The only reason we can fall is that God is willing to allow us to fall into a trial that exposes our weaknesses.
A person who has not fallen once after his salvation does not have a strong experience of salvation and is not very deep in spiritual life. Such a person may not have fallen, but he is not truly standing either. At the most he is lying down. A person who is lying down can never fall. It is still possible to have an outward appearance of being an active Christian, because even people who are lying down can still roll around on the ground. Other Christians may not be lying down, but they are still merely sitting; consequently, it is not easy for them to fall either. The people who fall most easily are those who are not only standing but even more who are walking and running. Those who follow the Lord intensely will fall the most, and the more intensely a person runs, the more serious will be his falls.
Some may say that it is not a good thing to fall, but falling is very beneficial. Anyone who has not fallen is not deep in the Lord. Those who are deep in the Lord are those who have fallen and risen numerous times. Their spiritual life involves both days and nights, springs and autumns, summers and winters, and sunny days and cloudy days. In their living there are risings and fallings. As such, their living is in the hand of God, who has no intention for them to remain on a straight path.
Some may say that this is a dangerous way to speak. However, it is not dangerous in any way. Without the Lord’s mercy we could not rise up even if we wanted to, and without the Lord’s willingness we could not fall even if we wanted to. Those with sufficient experience will worship the Lord and bow down to Him, saying, “Lord, You have the authority over death and life. You have separated day from night. You have led me with Your light during the day, but You have also led me through darkness. Everything is of You. You have been present throughout the entire course of my life.” Jacob, in his old age, had this view, and at the end of his days he worshipped God, leaning on the top of his staff and speaking of Him as “the God who has shepherded me all my life to this day” (Heb. 11:21; Gen. 48:15). Jacob’s staff was not a proof of his shepherding of others but of Jacob’s being shepherded by God. God’s hand is supporting me; when I fall, I am still in His hand. He leads me in every circumstance, whether it is a rising or a falling. He is my Shepherd.
If we have fallen, we should not be too sorrowful; rather, we should worship God. If we are able to stand, we should not be proud; rather, we should worship God. We should realize that the fall that one person experiences today may be our experience tomorrow (Gal. 6:1; 1 Cor. 10:12), and the stand that one person experiences today may be our experience tomorrow. We may be standing when another falls. However, it is quite possible that when he rises up, we may fall. God gives us a night when we ask Him for a day; He gives us a day when we are at ease with our night. God gives us situations that are contrary to our preferences in order to work Himself into us. Our thoughts are focused on a straight path, but His thoughts include ups and downs. Our expectations are based on the thought of a straight path, but God’s principles, ways, and methods involve curves.
We are in God’s hand; we did not determine the date of our birth or the time of our salvation. Consequently, we should not assume that the path ahead of us is in our hands. There is no need to be overly discouraged or sorrowful, much less boastful or proud, because everything is in His hand. He will have mercy on whomever He will have mercy, and He will have compassion on whomever He will have compassion (Rom. 9:15). He will visit whomever He will. He often comes to people in the dark of a “night,” and He often meets people when their “sky” is cloudy and overcast. We touch Him more when we are suffering, and we grow more when we are in distress.
May the Lord have mercy on us so that we may increasingly worship Him, submit to Him, and trust in Him. May we not be proud but humble, bowing down to Him, worshipping Him, and praising Him. When we stand, may we acknowledge His grace, and when we fall, may we receive His dealing. May we see His considerations when our circumstances are smooth, and may we realize His special visitation when our circumstances are difficult. He wants to lead us to walk on a way that is more difficult but also deeper, a way that often is beyond our understanding. Nevertheless, we need not be fearful or anxious, and it is foolish to be boastful or proud. Those who have spiritual light will not be discouraged or proud, much less compare themselves with others, because they realize that everything is in God’s hand. God gives life and allows death; He both exalts people and brings people low (Matt. 23:11; James 4:10; 1 Pet. 5:6); He causes people to ascend and to descend (Eph. 4:8-9); He leads people to a bright day and also leads them to a dark night; He provides smooth circumstances and adverse situations (Psa. 23:2, 4). This is a law in the universe and in spiritual matters.
Through these changing circumstances we grow by being broken and delivered from the self. When we are reduced, He is enlarged. When we decrease, He increases (John 3:30). Regardless of how much we change, the intention behind His hand never changes. No matter how He deals with us, either by touching or by seemingly not touching us, His hand upon us has a consistent purpose from beginning to end; that is, He wants to work in us to the extent that we will be filled with all that He is.
No matter whether we have fallen or have stood in the past, we should worship God. We need to prostrate ourselves before Him, confess that we are untrustworthy, and acknowledge that His grace is upon us. We need to ask God to open our eyes so that we may know His ways and so that our thoughts may be adjusted.
