Not subjective

One

  Subjectivity is another defect in the character of some of God's children, and in particular, of some workers for the Lord. If a person is subjective, he cannot do a good work.

  What is the meaning of being subjective? Being subjective means to insist on one's own opinions and to refuse others' opinions. It means to have a preconceived idea before listening to others and to hold on to the idea even after hearing from others. Subjectivity means a reluctance to accept or to be corrected. It means to have one's own opinion from the very beginning and to always insist on this opinion. A subjective person arrives at his own judgment before he hears anything from the Lord, before the facts are unfolded, and before others present their opinions. He insists on his judgment even after hearing something from the Lord, after the facts are unfolded, and after others have presented their side of the matter. This is the meaning of being subjective. The root cause of subjectivity is a self that has never been broken. When a man's self is not broken, he has a stubborn view of things, and these opinions are hard to break and correct.

Two

  What are the problems resulting from subjectivity? What losses does it bring to a man? If a brother or a sister is subjective, he or she will not be able to listen to others. We can learn to not be subjective by listening to others. We must be empty within before we can take in the Lord's word or others' words. If we are subjective, it is difficult for us to take in anything. It is essential for every Christian worker to cultivate the ability to hear what people have to say; he has to know others' affairs and to understand others' problems. We have previously said that a great problem with God's workers is that they cannot listen to others. The chief reason behind not being able to listen to others is subjectivity. When a person is subjective, he is filled up with all sorts of things. His opinions become an impregnable fortress, and his ideas are unchangeable. He is always filled with his own arguments and preoccupations. When a brother or a sister comes to him and tries to share a frustration with him or to unload a burden to him, he simply cannot understand what they are saying, even after listening for half a day. He cannot listen to others. This is one problem associated with subjectivity.

Three

  Another damaging effect of subjectivity is an inability to learn. A subjective person is very confident and clear about everything. He has made up his mind about everything already. He has formed an opinion about everything, and he is confident about everything. It is difficult for him to learn anything. When some young people first join the work, it is more difficult to teach them than it is to feed a child medicine. It seems that some things almost have to be forced down their throat. They are full of ideas, proposals, and ways. They fancy that they know all there is to know. Although they dare not claim to be omniscient, they act as if they are omniscient. It is harder to teach them something than it is to feed them bitter medicine. If a man needs to be spoon-fed every meal, how long can he survive? When we meet some brothers, we cannot help but sigh in our heart, "My brother, how many things can a person like you learn from the Lord?" The biggest problem with a subjective person is his inability to learn. This one thing alone can cost him dearly. Every time you want such a one to learn something, it seems as if you almost have to fight with him. You may beat him down, and he may learn a little. But the next time you want him to learn something, you have to struggle with him all over again. This is a great frustration. One basic requirement of the Lord's worker is being able to remain objective; he has to be so objective that he can readily receive help from others. Brothers and sisters, our help comes from everywhere. There are so many things that we have to learn. Suppose we only learn one lesson a month, or one lesson every half a year, or one lesson a year. How long can we live? How many things can we learn in our lifetime? A subjective person finds it harder to learn as the years go by. His subjectivity increases as time goes by. Indeed, subjectivity is a big problem among us.

  It is true that God's worker should be stable; his pathway should be straight and unwavering. But if his opinions, views, and judgments are also set and unyielding, he will have very little chance of learning any lesson, and his usefulness will be very limited. On the one hand, we need to be stable and unwavering before the Lord. On the other hand, we cannot be subjective. God's children should learn to not be subjective; they should learn to be flexible for God's move. Otherwise, it will be impossible for them to learn. In order to know whether or not a person is subjective, one only needs to find out whether he learns quickly or slowly, or if he can learn at all. One can tell if a person is subjective by the amount of spiritual things he learns and how often he learns them. The obstacle to learning anything is subjectivity. Subjectivity affects a person's ability to learn; it even stops him from learning anything.

  The basic requirement for spiritual advance is openness to God. Our heart, mind, and spirit must be wide open to Him. Being open to Him means that we are not subjective. The primary meaning of being open is not being subjective. Of course, in order for our spirit to be open to God, something deeper than not being subjective is involved. But not being subjective is the first condition. As soon as we are subjective, our gates are closed. Not being subjective means that we are sensitive to God, that we can learn, and that we can receive impressions. It is hard for many people to receive any impression from God. God has to use a rod or a whip or even a hammer to hit such ones before they receive any impressions from Him. We should learn to understand God's will as soon as His eyes turn. Many people are like horses and mules, who do not understand anything unless they are led by the bit and bridle. This is what it means to be subjective. A subjective person cannot pick up any signal from God. God may wrestle with him and allow him to come to a blind alley or a closed door, yet he is still arguing with God. He cannot quiet himself down to learn what he should learn. Many people are not meek and pliable enough before God. They are too hard and stubborn. They become a stumbling block to the work because they have not learned much or received much supply from the Lord all their life. They become a problem and a loss to the work.

Four

  Another big problem of a subjective person is that he cannot receive any guidance from God. He has no way to know God's guidance, and he is completely ignorant of His leading. Every subjective person is as far from God's will as the north pole is from the south pole. It is impossible for him to know God's will, because he does not match the qualifications of those who are God's followers. It takes a pliable and diligent man with a listening ear to receive guidance from God. When God's word comes to such a man, he acts upon it immediately without any subjective views of his own. Balaam's heart erred because it was inclined towards riches. He became subjective in his judgment, and he insisted on his judgment. This is why Balaam prayed to God again and again until God told him to go. When a man's mind is set, it is hard for him to understand God's will. We must learn to walk in God's will. We must realize that God's will often requires that we stop immediately, or it may require that we march immediately. We often have planned out the whole journey, only to find that the Lord wants us to stop immediately. What should we do? If the Spirit of the Lord tells us to stop, are we willing to stop? A subjective man will not stop. A person who has learned to listen to God is not subjective in any way: He will go forward when God commands him to go forward, and stop when God tells him to stop. Do not think that this is a simple thing. A subjective man cannot readily go forward when God tells him to go forward. However, once he has picked up momentum, it is hard for God to stop him. This is where our problem lies. A strenuous effort must be made to push forward those who are subjective, and once they start moving, no one can stop them. This is not the way of the instructed, who are pliable in the hands of God. When God tells them to move, they move. When God tells them to stop, they stop. These are the only ones who will receive guidance from God. Many people will not move until they receive harsh chastisement, and once they move, they never stop. They go on in the same direction continually. God has to stop them forcefully with His strong hand before they will stop. Their subjectivity prevents them from knowing God's will, much less carrying out His will.

  In Abraham's offering up of Isaac we get a beautiful picture of a man who was not subjective. If Abraham had been a subjective man when God asked him to offer up Isaac, it would have been difficult for him to obey. He would have had many things to say. He would have reasoned after this fashion: "I had no son before. The possibility of having one never even occurred to me. I thought that Eliezer was enough. It was God who wanted me to have a son. I did not have a thought of a son and neither did Sarah. It was all God's idea. Now that He has given me a son, why would He want me to offer him for a burnt offering?" Brothers and sisters, a subjective man would have had every reason to reject this demand! But Abraham was so simple. Even such a demand presented no problem to him. He believed that God could raise his son from the dead. As he stood by the altar and raised the knife to slay his son, God prepared a ram which he could offer instead of his son (Gen. 22:10, 13). If Abraham had been subjective, such a demand would have presented a new problem to him. He would doubtless have been bewildered and would have wondered how he could be told to do one thing at one moment and just the opposite the next moment. But Abraham did not think this way. He was not subjective. With some people, it is difficult for them to get on the altar, and once they are on the altar, it is more difficult for them to get down. They spend years getting on the altar, and once they are on it, they insist on remaining there until they die. A subjective man will act according to his own will even when he is trying to obey God. Even God cannot stop him. A subjective man is forced into obedience, and his obedience is many times the result of self-effort. He cannot be turned around no matter how hard others try. God's will and commandment may direct him to take back what he has given, but he cannot.

  It is interesting to note that when we identify our will with God's will, there often comes a time when God's will changes. If our own will cannot change accordingly, it will be hard for us to act simply according to His word. This is where our biggest problem lies. Do you know how a man tames a horse? A wild horse will refuse any rider on its back. It is difficult to break a horse. In order to break it, a trained rider has to jump on its back and allow it to kick and struggle until it tires itself out. The rider has to use his skills to remain on the horse's back. He has to let the horse run, perhaps for miles, or hundreds of miles. When the horse realizes that it cannot get rid of its master, it will yield to his command. Such horse trainers can turn a wild horse into a fine show horse. The horse can trot around in a small circle with a rope tied to a pole in the center. It can balance itself so well that it will not go so far away as to break the rope nor so close as to allow slack in the rope. It can run around hundreds of times, always keeping the same radius. The trainer trains the horse until it can be maneuvered in this way. When he is done with his training, the horse can be directed to go anywhere. It can go through a small entrance or a big gate; it will always be obedient. Brothers and sisters, we are like wild horses, and it is a big thing for the Lord to train us. He needs to do much work before we can be tamed. After a horse is trained, it will no longer be subjective. It will be so trained that as soon as its rider tugs a little on the reins, it will know whether its master wants it to run or walk. It will go as its master directs, not only one or ten times around the corral, but hundreds of times.

  Psalm 32:8-9 says, "I will instruct you and teach you concerning the way you should go;/I will counsel you; my eye is upon you./Do not be like a horse or like a mule, without understanding;/Whose trappings consist of bit and bridle to constrain them,/Else they do not come near you." This is very meaningful. We should be different from the horse or the mule. A dumb mule can be so trained that it can go wherever its master directs. It should be easier for God's children to be taught in the matter of divine guidance than it is to tame a horse. A horse, even when trained, is considered by God as a beast "without understanding." This is because it only knows the will of the master when it is kicked, pushed, or reined. As for us, we should look to the counsel of the Lord's eyes. This is something the horse and the mule cannot do. David said in this psalm, "I will counsel you; my eye is upon you" (v. 8). As soon as the Lord's eyes turn, we should know what He is saying. We should know even before His hand moves; we should know when His eyes turn only a little. Let us pay special attention to the eyes spoken of in this verse. A subjective man has no place here. Brothers and sisters, do not think that our person and our character are small things. Please remember that if we are subjective, we cannot be objective with God. Without training, we will be subjective all our life long. We cannot expect to suddenly know what God wants us to do. We may be satisfied being a tamed horse, but God says that a horse and mule, even when tamed, are without understanding. This means that it is not enough to be tamed. We have to move as fast as the Lord's eyes move. As soon as we know our Master's wish, we should act upon it. Whenever He gives the signal, we should stop. If we are filled with our own ideas, views, and subjective notions, it will be impossible for us to wait on the Spirit of the Lord and to move when He moves and stop when He stops. The Lord often wants us to stop, but we do not stop. We cannot stop because our very self has become involved in the endeavor. Those who seek after God's will must keep their self at bay. Those who do God's will must also keep their self at bay. We should move when the Lord wants us to move, and stop when He wants us to stop. Our self should be kept at bay. As soon as we become subjective, the self becomes involved, and we are unable to stop when the Lord wants us to stop. The problem with many people is twofold: In the beginning they cannot move, and once they start they cannot stop. These are serious problems. The biggest trouble we have is our subjectivity. This is what keeps God's will from being manifested through us.

  Understanding God's will has nothing to do with methods; it is a matter of the character of the person. A person will not understand God's will simply because someone else has told him the way to know His will. This is not possible. Only a right person armed with the right method can know God's will. If the person is wrong, he will not know God's will even if he has the right method. The understanding of God's will has to do with the person. Method alone cannot help us understand His will. This does not mean that understanding His will does not involve the use of any method. It means that the crucial factor in understanding God's will is our person. If our person is wrong, nothing will work even if we have the right methods. We must not be subjective. Before we can catch God's every move, we must be touched by the Lord and have our subjectivity dealt with to the extent that we have lost all of our self-opinions. If we cannot be flexible to move and stop at God's will, we cannot understand His will and cannot be His servant. God's servants must be quick to turn with God's will. We should ignore loud demands or clamorous voices from without; they are not our concern. Flexibility and openness to God's changes, haltings, and leadings are basic requirements of a worker of the Lord. This is the only way God can guide us to His pathway.

Five

  In regard to subjectivity, a further point should be noted: Our subjectivity must be dealt with by God before we will be fit to deal with others. God will lead us to deal with other men only when we ourselves are first dealt with. He will not commit anything to a subjective man. God cannot trust such a man. A subjective person cannot do God's will, and he has no way to lead others to do His will. If a subjective person is put into God's work to instruct others in the way of God, his own will comes out ten times stronger than does the Lord's. A subjective person wants everyone to listen to him. Unless a person is brought to the point where he has lost all interest in gaining a following, he cannot be used by the Lord. We should allow ourselves to be broken and smashed to the degree that we no longer crave obedience from others. We should not interfere with others' freedom, personal lives, or personal judgments. We have no interest in other people's life or affairs. As servants of the Lord, we must be dealt with by the Lord to such an extent. Only then can we be used by Him to speak as His deputy authority. Otherwise, there is a real threat of our usurping God's authority to carry out our own will, through which we would become a ruler, teacher, or father over God's children. The Lord said, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them...It shall not be so among you" (Matt. 20:25-26). If a man has never been broken by the Lord, if he secretly cherishes his own ideas, demands, and hobbies, God cannot use him because he is untrustworthy. If God entrusts His flock to such a person, he will lead the flock to his own house. Many people are not worthy of God's trust; God cannot entrust anyone into their hands. If a man is interested only in his own ways, he cannot lead others into God's way. Our brother Paul was very pliable. He was single, and he knew that it was better to remain single than to be married. Yet he never criticized marriage. Brothers and sisters, how exercised was our brother before the Lord. If a man is subjective and if his subjectivity is never broken, he will surely insist on everyone being a virgin and remaining unmarried. He will surely condemn every marriage. A subjective man can easily do this. But here was a man who was different. He could stand for what he did; he knew the value of what he was doing. Yet at the same time, he gave others the freedom to make their own choice. He wished that others would be spared of all sufferings of the flesh, yet he agreed that others should be married. Here was a man who was firm in the Lord, yet at the same time, he was soft and tender. In discussing the matter of marriage, he was still able to declare that the teaching of abstinence was a teaching of demons, even though he was a single man.

  Brothers and sisters, we have to learn to take such a stand. We can never overemphasize a truth just because we feel that way, nor can we shut our mouth to a truth just because we feel differently. Once we give up trying to influence God's truth according to our feelings, we are qualified to work and to lead others according to the Lord's leading. A basic requirement for us to be in the work is to be broken and to have our subjectivity dealt with. If our subjectivity still dominates us, we will lead God's work astray as soon as it is put into our hands. This is terrible. It is a terrible thing for a person to act rashly and speak carelessly. We should learn to stop interfering with other people's business. We should never dictate the lives or affairs of others with our own subjectivity. God does not interfere with man's free will. The tree of the knowledge of good and evil was placed in the garden of Eden. God told man not to eat of it, but He did not keep man away from it with a fiery sword. If the fiery sword in chapter three had been used in chapter two to guard the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, man would never have sinned. It would have been easy for God to do this. But He did not do this. Instead, He said, "But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die" (Gen. 2:17). If man insisted on eating it, that was his own business.

  We have to learn to not dominate others with our own thought. When others do not want to hear our word, we should turn away; we should not force them to listen to it. If we have a burden before the Lord, we should tell the brothers and sisters about it. It is good if they take our word. But if they do not take it, we should be happy to turn away. We should never impose our thought upon others. God has never done this, and neither should we. If a man chooses to rebel against God, He allows him to take his way. If others do not want to take our way, why should we insist? We have to learn to give up our insistence. We have to allow others to turn away from our advice. If we have learned the proper lessons before the Lord, we will gladly allow others to take their own way. We should not force others to listen to us or to take our way. We should not force others to receive our help. We may be clear about our function, but we should not force others to accept our function. God never forces anyone, and we should not force anyone either. None of us can be subjective in the work of God. None of us should try to make others listen to us. Let us learn to be attentive before Him. The more others listen to us, the greater is our responsibility before the Lord. How great a responsibility we have to bear if we say a wrong word to others! Do not rejoice at others taking our word. We have to remember the tremendous responsibility that is upon our shoulders. It is too great a thing for others to listen to us. If others listen to us when our way is crooked and we are not clear about God's will, we are truly the blind leading the blind. Not only will the blind who follow us fall into the pit, but both who are blind, ourselves and our followers, will fall into the pit (Luke 6:39). Never think that only followers fall and that leaders perhaps can escape the fall. When the blind lead the blind, both fall into the pit. We should not think that it is easy to speak, easy to teach, and easy to advise others. We should not think that it is a simple thing to say, "You should do this," or "You should do that." If we become teachers to many, instructing them to do this and that, there is the danger that both we and they will end up in the pit. Hence, we have to learn to fear God. We should realize that the more others listen to us, the more we should hear God's word in fear and trembling. Even when we are one hundred twenty percent sure of something, we should only say it with seventy to eighty percent assurance. We should be afraid of making mistakes. The easier it is for a man to speak weighty words, the less weighty he is before the Lord. The more confidence a person has, the less trustworthy he is. We should never think that as long as others listen to us, everything will be fine. Everything is not fine when others listen to us. What will we do to these obedient ones? Where will we lead them? We have to realize the seriousness of our responsibility. This is why we have to learn to not be subjective. One problem with subjectivity is a craving for others' ears. A subjective person likes to have others listen to him. He wants his ideas to be a source of direction for others and his opinions to be a source of light for others. But we have to realize that our opinions are not a source of light and our ideas are not a source of direction. We must learn to not lead others by the hand, learn to not force others to go our way, and learn to not impose obedience to God upon others. If the brothers and sisters are happy to go along with us, we should thank the Lord. If they want to choose their own ways, let them make their own choices. We should not try to drag others along with us. We should allow others to come and go as they wish. One characteristic of a man who knows God is a hesitation to force anyone to listen to him.

  A subjective man can never do this. He cannot listen to what others have to say, and he cannot receive guidance from the Lord. He does not feel that he has to learn anything from anyone; therefore, God cannot trust him with any work. If we have made all the decisions already before we come to God, we will not find out God's decision. Only a pliable person can find out God's decision. We must drop many things before we can sense God's will. If a man has never learned to deny his subjectivity, and if he is full of his own opinions, ways, ideas, and reasons, the church will be split as soon as God's work is placed into his hands. Division in the church results from man's subjectivity. Many people can only work individually; they cannot participate in the work of the church. They can only have individual service, not Body service. Many people have never touched the matter of authority. As a result, they can never be an authority. From the first day that many people began to work, they have never submitted to anyone. Surely God cannot make them an authority over others. Brothers and sisters, we should pay special attention to this matter. When a young brother joins the work, we must first test him. A subjective person always considers himself to be the head, and he always wants to assume leadership over others. He always tries to impose his idea upon others. A man who is dealt with by the Lord is always faithful and always willing to speak, yet he will never try to impose his will upon others. He will never try to subject others to his will. On the one hand, he becomes stable through God. On the other hand, he is not subjective and does not impose anything upon others unilaterally. Everyone is free to obey God or disobey Him. We cannot force anyone to do anything. A man bears his own responsibility before God. We should always allow others to have the opportunity to choose for themselves. May we all be pliable, always giving others the freedom to choose and always asking others what they would like to do. Our work is just to present the ways before men. What they choose is up to them. In everything we should give others the freedom to make their own choice. We should try our best not to make a choice for them.

Six

  Subjectivity can be expressed through the smallest things in our life. It is a nature, a habit. If a man's subjectivity is dealt with by the Lord, he will show a marked difference in the numerous small actions of his daily life. A subjective man is subjective in everything. He likes to control others. He likes to give his opinions, issue orders, and tell one to do this and another to do that. A subjective man has a solution for every problem. When a young worker of the Lord is put together with a few other brothers, you will immediately know whether or not he is a subjective person. If he is by himself, you cannot tell anything. But as soon as there are two persons, you will see that the one who is subjective always will try to be on top of the other. He will want to have a say in what to eat and what not to eat, what to wear and what not to wear, where to sleep and where not to sleep. He will always insist on this and that. He is omniscient and omnipotent. When two sisters are put in a room, we can tell immediately if one of them is subjective. If both of them are subjective, they will not get along with each other at all. If one is subjective, perhaps they can get along with each other. If both are subjective, neither one will be able to get along with the other. This does not mean that we should keep our mouth shut from now on. If difficulties arise in the work or problems arise with the workers, we have to be faithful. What I am saying is that after we have spoken and others have chosen to ignore our word, we should not force anything upon them. We should not feel hurt when others will not take our word. Many people treasure their own ideas too much. When others will not take their word, they feel hurt. This is the reaction of a subjective person. In order to be faithful, we have to say many things. But we do not say them because we are interested in meddling with others' affairs. We do not say them because our temperament or habit compels us to talk. We do not have to speak every time the opportunity arises. We can speak when there is a need, but we do not have to make a rule that we must speak all the time, nor do we have to make a habit of speaking. It is wrong to speak whenever an opportunity arises. It is wrong to speak with an undisciplined tongue. God has not appointed us to be the teacher of all. Some people are used to speaking and teaching others. This clearly shows that they are very subjective. If a man's subjectivity is not broken, it is hard for him to work for the Lord.

  A subjective man is not necessarily a faithful man. A faithful man speaks because he has to speak. He does not speak because he likes to speak or because he has a lust for speaking. A faithful man speaks because he does not want others to fall into error. He does not speak out of a lust for speaking. If a faithful man finds that his words are rejected, he does not feel dejected; he can turn away. But a subjective man is different. He has a lust to speak, and if he does not speak, he feels unhappy. He has a habit of opening his mouth every time he sees something. Do you see the difference? A subjective man speaks because he likes to speak; he likes to impose his will upon others. He likes to dominate others with his ideas and have others listen to his words. A subjective person finds it difficult to accept the rejection of his will. Brothers and sisters, a subjective man is totally different from a faithful man. We should be faithful. Many times, it is wrong if we do not open our mouth. But we must differentiate between faithfulness and subjectivity. A subjective person likes to meddle with others' affairs. He likes others to listen to his words. He likes to control others in everything. He gives orders to this person and directions to that person. He considers his methods the first and the best, and his ways the most perfect. He wants everybody to take his way. Many subjective persons cannot stand differences in others. Brothers and sisters, a subjective person is the narrowest kind of person in this world. A man can only be broad and generous after he has been dealt with by the Lord and his subjectivity has been removed. Only a broad person can tolerate those who are different from themselves. Subjectivity demands uniformity; it demands sameness. It cannot tolerate differences in others. If two subjective persons are put in a room, there will not be peace in the room. One wants to do one thing and the other wants to do another thing, and the room will be filled with arguments. One will think that he is bearing the cross, and the other will also think that he is bearing the cross. Both are having problems with the other, and both think that they are bearing the cross. This is what happens when two subjective heads are put together. A subjective person always tries to take things in his hand; he wants to establish himself as the leader among God's people. He makes instant decisions on how things should be done. A subjective person likes to meddle in the smallest affair. He likes to interfere, to control. This is a basic problem with a subjective person. We know that God will not entrust things to such persons. I have never seen God entrusting things to a subjective person. God cannot use such ones. I have never seen a subjective person who has traveled any considerable length spiritually. His disposition blocks him from receiving any instruction. A disposition that refuses to be instructed is unteachable and useless.

  A subjective person likes to take over and make proposals. If a person is subjective, he creates problems in God's work. Not only is he dull to learning and unfit for God's commissioning; his total energy is spent on his own subjectivity. As a result, he has no energy for God's work. When a man interferes with others' affairs, he becomes negligent of his own work, because other things fully occupy him. If a man keeps an eye on others' vineyards, his own vineyard surely will be neglected. Brothers and sisters, we do not have the time to indulge in subjectivity. God has entrusted enough ministry, responsibility, and work to us. We do not have the time to meddle with others' affairs. We have to focus our time and energy on the works that we should do. We are busy enough. Only those who are negligent in God's work and who give up their own responsibility before God have the energy to deal with the miscellaneous affairs of the other brothers and sisters. It is clear that all subjective persons have abandoned the work that God has assigned to them. They have allowed their own work to go unattended while busying themselves with others' business. If a worker always gives up his own work to take care of others' work, his own work will surely be poor. A subjective person can never be effective in the Lord's work. God cannot trust him, and even if He entrusts anything to him, it will not be properly carried out. It is difficult to remove a person's subjectivity, because his subjectivity is a matter of disposition. He is subjective in everything, not only in God's work, but in his personal life as well. He is subjective towards others' affairs. A subjective person is a very busy person in this world. He wants to be involved in everything. As a result, he cannot run a straight course before the Lord. He has his opinion, view, and way for everything. This presents a real spiritual problem and a real spiritual barrier. We have to pray, "Lord, be gracious to me. Make me a pliable person before You. I want to be pliable and soft, not only before You, but before all the brothers and sisters." Paul was such a person. His letters were "weighty and strong." When it came to the matter of his testimony before God, he was weighty and strong. But when he came face to face with the Corinthians he was "weak and his speech contemptible" (2 Cor. 10:10). Paul was uncompromising in the testimony he bore. This is the reason his words were "weighty and strong." But when he talked with others, he was meek, not harsh. Brothers and sisters, we have to learn to differentiate between the two. In our ministry we have to be strong and weighty, but in ourselves we should not be subjective. "Some preach Christ even because of envy and strife, and some also because of good will, these out of love, knowing that I am set for the defense of the gospel. But the others announce Christ out of selfish ambition, not purely, thinking to raise up affliction in my bonds. What then? Only that in every way, whether in pretense or in truthfulness, Christ is announced; and in this I rejoice; yes, and I will rejoice" (Phil. 1:15-18). Do you see the balance here? When others take the same way as we do, we thank the Lord for it. If others will not take the same way, but take a different way, we are still their brothers and sisters. We are not bothered by it. We have to maintain this balance. On the one hand, we have to be faithful to our testimony. On the other hand, we should not be subjective in ourselves. A faithful man is never subjective, and a subjective man is not necessarily faithful. We have to draw the line clearly between the two.

  In summary, subjectivity is simply an unbroken self. Brothers and sisters, we have to pray for God's breaking work, praying that we will not be subjective in any way, whether towards others or towards our own affairs. The Lord has to crush us completely before we will be soft and meek. Without such a crushing, we will always be somewhat subjective. Some people may be sharper than others, but a subjective person is always opinionated, full of methods, and ready to take control of others. We have to allow the Lord to deal with us in a severe way at least once so that we can be crushed to the ground and never rise again. When a test comes again, we then will be faithful to our testimony. We will allow others the freedom to choose to follow or to not follow us. We will not have the compulsion to speak. We are not here to be a teacher to many. We should not be so eager to speak, propose, make decisions, teach, or control the work. Brothers and sisters, we should be strong in our ministry, but at the same time, we should learn to be meek and not subjective before the Lord.