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Appendix E
March 19, 1989
John Ingalls:
Last week, as Brother Al Knoch and I were praying and fellowshipping together concerning the church, we became very clear before the Lord that at this time we need to withdraw from the eldership in Anaheim. We want to make that known this morning, and we are taking that step this morning to withdraw from the responsibilities and duties of the eldership. We would like to give a little word of explanation why we feel to take this step at this time.
Firstly, I would give a little testimony from my heart to you all. It has been about 28 or 29 years now since I first saw the vision of Christ and the Church. That was indeed very precious, and I was riveted by it. What a mercy that I could see Christ, the all-inclusive Christ and the church as His Body; even more, to see the ground of oneness! That vision has held me all these years; it has preserved me and strengthened me and enabled me to go on. I have never lost that vision and still desire to be obedient to it.
But a year and a half ago this very month I began to realize that our practices have differed and deviated from our vision. Our vision was the same, our teaching was mostly the same, the truth is always the same, but our practice has really differed. Our practice has not at all matched our teaching. This has been a grief and a deep concern to me. The Lord knows how much this is so.
Not only that, but a year and a half ago I also began to realize that the nature of what we call the Lord’s recovery has changed. This also was a great concern. When the nature changes, that is serious, very serious.
Yesterday and today, I wrote down a few points which I would like to mention briefly without much elaborating. These points embody my concerns and give the basis upon which we are making this decision this morning.
1. There has been a change of emphasis to the building up of the work or the ministry more than the local churches. When we first received the vision of the church we heard time and time again that the ministry is for the churches. But it seems that in the past years this has been turned around. There has been more emphasis on the churches being for the ministry. The ministry has been promoted, exalted, and built up, and the churches have suffered greatly in the process.
2. There has been a great effort and promotion to unite the saints and the churches around a certain leader and organization, and we cannot agree with that.
Some of you may be familiar with a little book that’s been printed by the Living Stream Ministry. We’ve had it for many years, The Beliefs and Practices of the Local Churches. I would surely agree that these are our beliefs, but I would have to say concerning some of the things, they are not our practices. I would like to read one short paragraph here. At the end of the book some questions are asked, and one of them is: “Who is our leader?” (page 16). The answer is:
“Our unique leader is Christ. We have no official, permanent, or organized human leadership. Furthermore, there is no hierarchy of any kind and no world-wide leader. We regard no person as infallible, and we do not follow anyone blindly. On the contrary, we follow only those whose teaching and practice is in accordance with the truth of God’s Word….”
Now this, I believe, we would all subscribe to and say that’s our belief. But I’m sorry to say, that has not been our practice.
3. There has been much pressure with full expectation that all the saints and the churches will conform to the burden of the ministry and be identical with one another in full uniformity of practice, to carry it out. This also we cannot agree with.
4. In February 1986 there was an elders’ training in Anaheim, and Al and I were there. During that time, a strong word was released concerning all the churches being identical and everyone following the ministry with its one leadership absolutely. At the end of that training, the brothers wrote a letter which, with perhaps two or three exceptions, we all signed. Brother Al Knoch and I signed that letter. There were 419 signatures of elders, so many that it required 27 pages to include them all. That letter is duplicated in the Elder’s Training Vol. 8 if you desire to look at it.
At present time and for the past year and a half, we have regretted very much that we signed that letter, and even more, that such a letter was ever written. There is no precedent of that in the Word; furthermore there is no scriptural basis for the contents of such a letter. We agreed in that letter that we would be identical with all the churches, that we would follow the ministry absolutely, and that we realized Brother Lee’s leading was indispensable to our oneness. Then at the bottom of the letter, we said that all these things were according to the teaching of the Word of God. But those things are not according to the teaching of the Word, and we regret very much that we subscribed to them. I want to state publicly and make it clear that I would retract my signature.
5. There has been quite an emphasis, at least in practice, on a kind of centralization of the churches and the work, which we also find contrary to the Word of God.
6. There has been a pervasive control exercised over the church. Now at least I can speak for Anaheim. I know this to be a fact, and I’m in a position to know this. There has been much outside influence exercised upon the church which has made it very difficult to go on by getting our leading directly from the Lord. This control has not been exercised so much directly, but very much indirectly, through videos, conferences, trainings, and elders’ meetings.
7. Church history reveals that in the history of one denomination after another, not all started as a denomination. There was a fresh move of the Lord. The Lord did something among His people in a fresh way, with His presence and blessing. But after the saints in that group multiplied and other groups were formed, they all agreed together and decided to affiliate in order to preserve what they had received.
The second thing they did again and again was to start a training center, a Bible School, or a Seminary to educate their people in the truth they had received. From there on out, it was a full-blown denomination. The first step is affiliation under one leadership; the second is some sort of training center. That is the way group after group has gone, and, sorry to say, we are also going that way. I have to speak honestly, and I regret it very much. I wish we could reverse that process.
8. I must say truthfully from my heart that I very much appreciate Brother Lee’s portion; it has been a great portion from the Lord which has brought blessing to us all. But, honestly speaking, he has been exalted and honored above what is written, according to 1 Corinthians 4:6. This surely is unmistakable, and we regret this very much. We repent of having ourselves taken part in this.
One of the brothers said to me at one time, “I’m going to put a sign up outside the meeting hall here – The Local Church of Witness Lee.” I would hate that there would be in reality any such thing, but here has been a strong tendency toward this. The church should not be the church of anyone but Christ.
9. Our oneness is not based on any spiritual leader, gifted person, or teaching. A spiritual leader should never be made an issue or a factor of division, but Brother Lee and his ministry have been made a great issue and factor of division among us.
10. In Matt. 22 the Lord was speaking to the Pharisees. They were asking Him all kinds of questions, trying to trick Him and catch Him. Then He asked them the question, “What do you think of Christ? Whose Son is He?” Everyone has to answer that question, What do you think of Christ? But I’m afraid, that question has been changed among us to read this way – “What do you think of Witness Lee? What is your relationship to him? And that kind of question should never be asked. Such a question should never become an issue or factor among us, so that our going on, or our relationship with the saints and with the church, is made to depend on our relationship to him [Witness Lee]. But this has been the case. When this is done, the ground of oneness is replaced with something else.
11. There is no doubt that God wants a testimony on the earth of our oneness in Christ. Hence with all saints we should practice a real oneness. We believe this, but I’m sorry, we don’t practice it much. We have a teaching concerning the ground of oneness, and this matter, of course, is very precious. But I’m afraid, honestly speaking, that we have applied this teaching in a divisive and sectarian way, so that we divide ourselves from other Christians. This is due to an improper attitude and application of the truth. We should repent of this. I repent, because I have participated in this myself. I feel that in the local churches we have become very narrow and small; narrow in view, in our outlook, and in our reception of other saints. The body is so big, but we have become so narrow. This is manifested by our attitude toward other Christians.
12. Our attitude toward other Christians is one of belittling them and thinking we’re superior to them. I don’t know how many times we’ve heard this expression, “Poor Christianity!” We say that we’re speaking only of the system, not of the people, but our attitude has definitely spilled over to the people. What we need is the reality of the oneness, not just the teaching or the slogan. We have much, not only to give, but also to learn from others.
13. “Let us go forth unto Him, outside the camp, bearing His reproach.” This verse in Heb. 13:13 is very much with me and has been with me for weeks. I desire to do that. I’d like to go outside of every camp, especially the camp of myself, and not only go out, but go unto Him. I’m afraid we may go out, but not go unto Him. Then that’s meaningless. The Lord is still calling His sheep out of the fold, so there could be one flock with one shepherd. May the Lord bring us to Himself, outside of every fold, every camp!
14. Our oneness should be as large as the whole Body of Christ. Any oneness that is smaller than this, we should leave, we should not keep.
15. The local administration. This means that we all go directly to Him for His leading in the church here, at the same time maintaining a proper fellowship with other saints, other churches, and the Lord’s servants.
Regarding this, I will read a couple of sentences in this book, The Beliefs and Practices of the Local Church. The question is “Where is your headquarters?” The answer is:
“Each local church is autonomous.” (page 16)
Now I have never used this word autonomy, but this word, “autonomous” is used in this book published by the Living Stream Ministry (1978):
“Each local church is autonomous in its administration, Therefore, there is no central headquarters.”
And another sentence (page 19):
“In this matter, as in all administrative affairs, the local churches are autonomous and locally governed.”
16. There has been to some extent an atmosphere of fear brought in among the saints and among the churches, bringing the conscience of the saints into bondage. I believe this has been done by an over-stressing and distortion of the teaching concerning deputy authority. This has brought the saints into a condition where they are fearful to follow their conscience, to be one with their spirit, and sometimes to speak their genuine concerns.
17. There has been too much emphasizing of methods more than the inner anointing and external big success more than the experience of the inner life. This is surely a deviation from the central lane of God’s economy.
18. The so-called new way is not our problem. The matters of preaching the Gospel, having home meetings, practicing mutuality in our meetings with everyone sharing are scriptural. We have no problem with these things, and we like to practice them. Indeed we have practiced them. Actually, these things are not new. Of course, our practicing of them might be new.
So, saints, in all honesty to you all, in all honesty to the Lord, and in all honesty to ourselves, based on the above points, we feel we must withdraw from the eldership. We are not able to lead you in this way, nor are we able to lead you out of this way. Many of you feel strongly that you would like to take a certain direction, and as elders we cannot lead you in that direction. We would not like to frustrate you either, but rather let you go on with the Lord in the way you feel you should.
We’re really happy that all the saints are getting into the Word more and more. That’s very precious, and I encourage you all to go on in that way as much as possible. I want to say that we really love you in the Lord. The Lord knows that. We care for you, and we wish you all the very best in the Lord. You are in our prayers. You will always be in our prayers. We ask you to pray for us too. Pray for Brother Al and me. If we’ve offended any of you saints, we ask you to please forgive us. We surely never intended to offend anyone of you. We still like to keep our fellowship with you all as fellow-members of the Body of Christ.
I’m very thankful now. I have peace with myself. I have peace with the Lord, and I have peace with all of you.
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Al Knoch:
I am so thankful that John could share those points because I could not do it so clearly. I hold the same concerns and we have been in fellowship a lot over the last year. Before Godfred withdrew, we were in fellowship with him and also these were the same concerns we presented to Brother Lee in all our times with him. So he knows all of these things already and he has considered them, and in San Diego, I believe, he said he had brought all these matters to the Lord and he feels there’s no problem concerning them.
As elders in the recovery we do have a problem with many of our practices, and there’s no way we could, with a good conscience, continue on in the position without the reality. How can we lead you? We can’t lead in that way and yet the recovery is going that way.
So we brothers feel, as John said, it’s good for us, it’s good for you, and it’s good for the Lord that we withdraw at this time. The reason we didn’t withdraw sooner, though we were clear to withdraw last December, is that we felt the need to stand here for these very concerns for awhile longer to see what could be done and to see how the saints would respond to this kind of stand. But the more we have done this, the more clear we have become that there will not be any change at this time in the way the recovery is going.
We realize that and just hope that you would respect the way we feel the Lord is leading us. I’ve been here 25 years and I have had hardly any contact with Christians outside of this room. Practically all my fellowship has only been with the saints in the Lord’s recovery as we knew it. In the last few weeks, I’ve been contacting a few other Christians and I have begun to see that the Lord is really working in a lot of places in ways I didn’t realize.
I also have had the realization that He has His timing and His leading in people’s lives and He puts them in situations and puts them through certain experiences that cause them to do certain things that others can’t understand. I believe our withdrawal from the eldership might be one of those things. Some of you may not understand how we could be in this position this morning, knowing us all these years. I would beg you to trust the Lord, seeing that we’re not doing this lightly. We feel compelled to withdraw not just outwardly, but inwardly. Also circumstantially the Lord has pushed us into this position.
We have received a number of letters from other elders condemning the fact that we didn’t publicly rebuke those who sent out tapes of our former meetings. We hope to answer those letters soon and to apologize for anything wrong, but we felt at the time led by the Lord not to control those saints or to publicly expose them or rebuke them. We let them do what they felt they should do. In many cases, we still don’t even know who they are. We didn’t investigate to find out. That was their business. They felt to do it. They are responsible before the Lord for what they have done. Now we feel we must withdraw from the eldership and we are responsible before the Lord for this action.
I want to say before I withdraw that I want to thank you all. I can never express to you how much I appreciate all the support you’ve given to my family over the years. If I have any regret, I regret that my service as an elder has been inadequate. I have often felt I never should have been an elder. I was not constituted for that. I was appointed so I tried my best and did whatever I was told.
But inwardly and in reality, as all the years have proved, I have felt I should not be in this position. For months and months, I’ve had a problem, not only with these points but also with my inadequacy to carry out this kind of function. This is what I regret. On the other hand, I am a member of the Body of Christ and I should be functioning as that member and not be put into another function. I am so relieved this morning to withdraw from something I really am not. I like to be a simple brother and a very small member of His Body.
I also want you to know that I do not regret the last 25 years. I do not regret my experiences in the local church. The Lord brought me here. You may have heard my testimony concerning how the inward spirit led me to the church in Los Angeles. When I walked into my first meeting, He said “You’re home.” The Holy Spirit was poured upon me the same night that I attended my first meeting. So both inwardly and outwardly, against all my doctrinal beliefs, the Lord confirmed that this is where He wanted me. I’ve been here 25 years and I’ve never doubted that the Lord brought me here. Now the Lord is leading me on, not by saying, I’m home, and not by pouring out His Spirit, but as I told you, a kind of compelling.
One thing I have prayed is that you dear saints who have known us all these years will not be afraid to have further fellowship with us. I can say before the Lord with a clear conscience that I am not a negative person. I don’t want to damage Brother Lee or the recovery, rather I pray for them both every day. So I beg you not to be afraid to have fellowship in the future. I’m not leaving the church. I can’t do that unless I can unregenerate myself. I may not come to every meeting. That, I leave up to the Lord’s leading. But when the Lord leads me, I want to come and when I come, I don’t want to feel that I am an outcast. Otherwise, you can forget about calling yourselves a local church and just call yourselves a sect.
If I am really negative and you find through our fellowship that I am poisonous, tell me that and don’t fellowship any more. But I have no intention to say anything negative; rather, I just want to speak about Christ. Our desire now is to follow Him. And we cannot follow Him with a clear conscience without withdrawing from the eldership. So as long as this is clear, I don’t need to say any more. I believe that all of you have the same desire to follow Him. So if you respect His leading for me and I respect His leading for you, I believe we will all end up in the same place: the Body of Christ.
So I’m very happy. I am quite relieved to have this matter over with and I feel comforted that you have been so receptive to our withdrawal. I believe others are prepared to lead you on. I think there will be no problem.
Let us pray for one another and gather together as much as we can as the Lord leads us. Let us pray that the Lord will get His testimony in the next few years before the end comes. Pray especially that the intimate love for Christ and knowledge of Christ will increase in each of us. We realize that the corporate aspect can only come out of the individual aspect. You can never be something corporately you are not individually. Let us pray that all of us may know the Lord and love the Lord much more and follow Him in such a clear way with a good conscience.
