Through the sanctifying, cleansing, nourishing, and cherishing Christ will gain a glorious church as His Bride. Just as Eve came out of Adam and went back to Adam to be one flesh with him, so the church comes out of Christ and will go back to Christ to be one spirit with Him. God’s desire is that the church which comes out of Christ and returns to Christ will be a glorious church, a church that expresses God and manifests Him. By the sanctifying, cleansing, nourishing, and cherishing the church is being saturated with the essence of God. In this way the church is becoming the Bride to express Christ. Every local church today must be such an expression of God.
The glorious church, the church that expresses God, must also be holy and without blemish. As such a holy church, she must be first separated from everything common and then permeated and saturated with the element of God.
In order to be without blemish, the church must be without mixture. To be unclean is one thing, and to have some mixture within us is another. We need to be both pure and without mixture. To be without mixture means that in our being we have nothing other than God. For example, we are like precious stone that has no foreign element or substance within it. One day the church will not only be clean and pure, but also without blemish, without mixture. She will be altogether the mingling of the Triune God with a resurrected, uplifted, and transformed humanity. In order that Christ may gain such a church, we are presently undergoing His sanctifying, cleansing, nourishing, and cherishing.
The first four chapters of Ephesians cover the fulfillment of God’s eternal purpose. For the fulfillment of His purpose, God needs the universal new man, the church as the full-grown man in chapter four. In this respect, the new man is the highest aspect of the church. From the church as the assembly we proceed to the church as the household of God, then to the church as the Body, and finally to the church as the full-grown man.
Along with the need for God’s purpose to be fulfilled, there is also the need for Christ to be satisfied. Within Christ there is the longing, the deep desire, for satisfaction. Only the church as the Bride can satisfy the longing in Christ’s heart.
Even in the relationship between husband and wife, the wife should care for her husband’s satisfaction and not merely do certain things for her husband. Before the creation of Eve, the Bible says, “It is not good that the man should be alone” (Gen. 2:18). Therefore, the woman was created to fulfill the man’s need for satisfaction. According to the Bible, the satisfaction of a man depends upon the woman. In Ephesians 5 Paul presents the church as the Bride for Christ’s satisfaction. As we have seen, what is required for the church to be the Bride is not just truth and grace, but light and love.
The church, who is the new man for the fulfillment of God’s purpose and the Bride for the satisfaction of the longing in Christ’s heart, is also the warrior for the defeat of God’s enemy. Through the spiritual warfare of the church as the warrior, God’s problem with the enemy is solved. If the church is to be the warrior to defeat the enemy, she must have both might and the whole armor of God. Therefore, the church is the new man for the fulfillment of God’s purpose, the Bride for Christ’s satisfaction, and the warrior for the defeat of God’s enemy.
Between the section on the church as the Bride (5:22-33) and the church as the warrior (6:10-20), we have 6:1-9, which deals with the relationship between children and fathers and between slaves and masters. If we neglect this portion of the Word, we can not be a proper Bride or a proper warrior.
Verse 1 says, “The children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.” In exhorting the children and the parents, the apostle deals with the children first, since trouble comes mostly from them.
In this verse Paul does not simply speak of children, but of the children. By using the definite article before children Paul indicates that the children of believers are not common. They are different from the children of people in the world. Therefore, the particular children, those in the families of believers, are exhorted to obey their parents in the Lord.
The phrase “in the Lord” indicates obedience to the parents by being one with the Lord. It also indicates that this should be done not by self-effort, but by the Lord, and not according to the natural concept, but according to the Lord’s word. The children of believers should realize that they are to obey their parents by being one with the Lord. Moreover, they are to obey their parents not by their own strength, but by the Lord Himself. Their obedience is to be according to the Lord’s word, according to the Scriptures.
In this verse Paul says that for the children to obey their parents in the Lord is right. The Greek word may also be rendered just. To obey the parents is both right and just.
In verses 2 and 3 Paul goes on to say, “Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise, that it may be well with you, and that you may live long on the earth.” This is not only the first commandment with a promise, but also the first commandment concerning man’s relationship with man (Exo. 20:12). The promise, mentioned in verse 3, is that it may be well with the children and that they may live long on the earth. The first part of the promise is related to prosperity in material blessing; it also refers to living in a peaceful situation. The second part is to have longevity. According to this commandment, prosperity and longevity are God’s blessings in this life to those who honor their parents.
Honoring is different from obeying. Obedience refers to an action, whereas honor denotes an attitude. It is possible for the children to obey their parents without honoring them. In order to honor their parents, the children need a certain attitude, a certain spirit. All the children need to learn to obey their parents with honor.
If we would live long on the earth, we need to honor our parents. Those who fail to honor their parents commit suicide in a gradual way. They actually shorten their life on earth. If you wish to prolong your days, learn to obey your parents with honor. In the Bible this is the unique condition for having a long life. Anyone who desires a long life needs to fulfill this condition.
In verse 4 Paul turns to the fathers: “And the fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but nurture them in the discipline and admonition of the Lord.” Provoking to anger damages the children by stirring up their flesh. It is always destructive for parents to be angry with their children. For this reason, I counsel the parents not to lose their temper when dealing with their children. Not provoking the children’s anger requires the fathers’ anger to be dealt with by remaining under the cross. The only way we can keep from losing our temper is to stay on the cross. In dealing with your children’s wrongdoings or misbehavior, you must firstly go to the cross and stay there. Otherwise, you will lose your temper, and this loss of temper will provoke your children’s anger.
Instead of provoking the children to anger, the fathers are to nurture them in the discipline and admonition of the Lord. To nurture children means to bring them up, to raise them, by nourishing them. Raising children requires that the parents give them the needed instruction related to human life, family life, and social life. The word admonition here includes instruction. Paul was probably referring to the Old Testament requirement that parents instruct their children with the word of God (Deut. 6:7). This means that we are to teach our children with the Bible. Along with this instruction, we sometimes must discipline them, chastise them. It is crucial that parents learn to nurture the children in the discipline and admonition of the Lord.
As parents, we must do our duty with respect to our children. This means that we should not only teach them, but also set up an example for them to follow. Just as the Lord Jesus sanctified Himself for the sake of His disciples (John 17:19), so parents should sanctify themselves for the sake of their children. Those who do not have children may be free to do certain things, such as sleep late in the morning. But those with children do not have the liberty to do these things. For the sake of their children, they must be restricted. Children always imitate their parents. Therefore, it is the parents’ responsibility to set up a high standard and a proper pattern and example for their children to follow.
However, no matter how good an example is set by the parents, how the children develop depends on God’s mercy. On the one hand, the parents must keep a high standard, but on the other hand, they need to trust in the Lord. Day by day we should tell Him, “Lord, these children are not mine; they are Your possession placed in my custody for a period of time. Lord, what I am doing with them is simply fulfilling my responsibility. How they will turn out, Lord, depends absolutely on Your mercy.”
It is possible for parents to be selfish concerning the spiritual welfare of their children. If their children get saved and become spiritual, they are very happy. However, these parents may not be happy to see the children of other families becoming more spiritual than their children. Most parents in the church hope that their children will become the future apostles, elders, and deacons. Thus, even in this matter, we are selfish.
I once read of a certain woman who prayed desperately for her child to be saved. Although she prayed daily for years, still her child was not saved. One day she inquired of the Lord why He did not answer her prayers and keep His promise. The Lord told her that He would surely keep His promise and answer her prayers. However, she was too selfish. If she would stop praying so much for her child and begin to pray for the children of others, she would see His faithfulness. From that time onward, she began to pray for other children to be saved. After a short while, her child was saved.
This story illustrates the fact that we may be selfish even in praying for the salvation of our children. Not to pray for our children is wrong, but to be fully occupied with prayer for them in a selfish way is also wrong. Hence, the matter of the salvation of our children and their spiritual welfare is also a test to us.
In 6:5-9 Paul deals with the relationship between slaves and masters. Concerning this relationship, he exhorts the slaves first because the source of trouble is mostly with them. Verse 5 says, “The slaves, obey your masters according to flesh with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as to Christ.” In the apostle’s time, slaves were purchased by their masters, and the masters had the right over their lives. Some slaves and some masters became brothers in the church. As brothers in the church, they were equal. But in their homes those who were slaves still had to obey the brothers who were their masters according to flesh.
Paul exhorts the slaves to obey with fear and trembling, in singleness of heart, as to Christ. Fear is the inward motive, and trembling is the outward attitude. Singleness means to be pure in motive, with only a single purpose. The slaves are to be single; they are not to have a double purpose. That is, they are not to serve their masters with the intention of receiving some gain for themselves.
The slaves are to be in obedience to their masters as to Christ. This means that the slaves are to regard their masters as if they were the Lord. The relationship between slaves and masters is a type of our relationship with Christ, our Master. We should obey Him as a slave, in singleness of heart.
In verse 6 Paul goes on to say, “Not with eye-service as men-pleasers, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from the soul.” If a brother in slavery stands in his position and obeys his master, he is in the eyes of the Lord a slave of Christ, doing the will of God, and his service is as to the Lord and not to men (v. 7). Such a slave is to do the will of God from the soul. The words “from the soul” here equal from the heart, from the inner being. This means to serve not only with the physical body, but with the heart. The slaves were to serve “as to the Lord and not to men.” This indicates that Paul’s intention was to direct the slaves to the Lord. His desire was that they would learn to serve their masters as the Lord.
Concerning the slaves, Paul concludes in verse 8, “Knowing that whatever good thing each one does, this he shall receive from the Lord, whether a slave or a freeman.” The word this refers to the good thing. Whatever good thing we do, we shall receive the same from the Lord. If the slaves do something good, the Lord will return to them that same good thing. This means that the good thing they do will become a reward to them.
In verse 9 Paul says, “And the masters, do the same things toward them, giving up threatening, knowing that both their Master and yours is in the heavens, and there is no respect of persons with Him.” The masters who had the right over the lives of their purchased slaves should give up threatening, because the Lord in the heavens is the real Master of both them and the slaves. In the flesh, some may be slaves, and others may be masters. But in the eyes of the Lord, there is no difference between slaves and masters. According to Colossians 3:11, in the new man there is no slave or freeman. In the church, we all are brothers. However, in the flesh there still is the distinction between slaves and masters.
Regarding all these exhortations, Paul is making one key point: For the sake of the church life, we need to have a proper human living in this present age. This is an extremely important lesson for us all to learn.
