
Scripture Reading: Rev. 2:2; 6:9b; 2:13-15, 20, 24; 3:2, 9, 15-18, 20; 17:4-6; 18:4
In this chapter we want to begin seeing the spiritual lessons that Brother Nee learned through his sufferings. I was with Brother Nee for a long period of time. In my initial years in the work with him, especially in November and December of 1933 and January and February of 1934, he had many personal times with me to tell me many things concerning church history, his history, and the history of the Lord’s work in China. His intention, of course, was to help me. He told me the lessons he learned through his sufferings. I could never forget the things he related to me because of the deep impression and great help that I received.
The first thing Brother Nee suffered was poverty. He was enlightened to see that he had to serve the Lord by faith to fulfill the Lord’s calling. He saw that he should not be hired by any mission, denomination, or person. He exercised a pure and single faith in God for his living (see Watchman Nee’s Testimony, ch. 3). I followed Brother Nee in 1933 to take this way. Although this was very difficult, we learned the faithfulness of the Lord. The economic situation of China during that time was not good. In such a situation we suffered poverty. Sometimes when Brother Nee was living in Shanghai in the early days of the church life, he had nothing to eat except a small amount of bread for the entire day. This happened a number of times, and I and other co-workers also suffered things like this. At times we did not know if we would eat our next meal. The Lord really did some miraculous things to take care of us.
In 1937 Brother Nee cabled us to come to him in Shanghai. I was assigned during that time to work in northern China, and Brother Nee had called a conference of all the co-workers in January to release the messages on the normal Christian church life. After we received his cable to come to that conference, we got on a train that took thirty-six hours to reach Shanghai. We traveled third class. The first-class compartment had places to sleep, but we did not have the money to pay for that. Brother Nee met us at the train station in Shanghai. After the conference of the co-workers in Shanghai, I was invited to minister in Hangchow. I was also invited to Nanking, the capital, and I traveled through many cities. I was away from home about two and a half months.
Because I left home in response to Brother Nee’s urgent invitation, I did not have time or much money to arrange anything for my family. At that time we had four children. After I was gone about three or four weeks, my family ran out of food. My wife and some of the children knelt down and prayed for the next day’s food. Not too long after they prayed, an old sister came to our house late in the night. This sister was well-off financially, but she did not love the Lord that much. She did not even attend the meetings regularly. She told my wife that while she was at home, there was something in her heart which caused her to have no rest. She felt that she had to come to my wife with an envelope. She gave the envelope to my wife and left. There was enough money in the envelope to meet the need of my family. This is an illustration of how the Lord took care of our need as we lived by faith in Him.
It was very hard to live by faith in God, without being hired by anyone, in the financial situation of China in those days. Brother Nee was the pioneer among us to take this way in all of China. The Lord Jesus really needed him and used him to cut and pave the way. Then we followed in his steps. Sometimes people would tell me, “You are just a follower of Watchman Nee.” Although they said this to put me down, I felt wonderful and glorious.
Brother Nee’s sufferings also came from his ill health. He contracted tuberculosis in 1924, and by 1929 he was dying from this disease. Eventually, he received a word from the Lord, he stood on that word, and he was healed. His testimony of this is in Watchman Nee’s Testimony, pages 36-41. Later, he had stomach troubles, and then he had heart disease. He did not get married until 1934, and his ministry began about 1923. Eleven years of his ministry passed, and he did not have a wife to help him. He lived as a single man until 1934, so he really suffered.
He always told me beginning in 1934 that he could die at any time. Many times while he was speaking, he had to lean on the stand because he was in so much pain. He told us that many times, while he was speaking, he would break out in a cold sweat. Also, before he went to conference meetings, there were many times that he had to lay on the bed until the time came for him to speak. After he spoke, he immediately went back home to lie down. I believe that eventually in 1972 he died of his heart disease while he was in the Communists’ prison. We received definite information from a very close relative of his who was always taking care of him. He lived with heart disease for close to forty years. He was suffering all the time.
Through his poverty, he learned the lesson of faith. He knew how to be a “lily” (Matt. 6:28), living on this earth in total dependence upon God. He lived on this earth by faith in God, without trusting in any human help. Furthermore, because of his ill health, he had to learn to depend on the Lord. He learned to live by the resurrection life to meet his physical need. Many times he ministered not by his physical strength or energy but by the resurrection life. I saw this while he was speaking. Through all his sufferings, he learned some real lessons. I cannot estimate the tremendous help we received from these lessons. I personally received great help from his experiences.
In addition to his poverty and bad health, Brother Nee also suffered all kinds of persecution from Christianity. This is the third category of his sufferings. I would like to relate a little history so that we can see the background of Brother Nee’s sufferings in this category. The Boxer Rebellion in China was in 1900. This was an attempt by some to drive foreigners out of China and to force Christians, both native and foreign, to renounce Christ. Afterward, there was a revolution in China, which succeeded in 1911. After 1911 there was no persecution of Christianity throughout all of China. Instead, many people began to have a positive attitude toward Christianity. As we have seen, Brother Nee was saved in 1920. That was during a time when Christianity had become prevailing. During that time the Lord was moving in the universities, and many young people were saved. Thus, there was not any persecution or opposition from the unbelievers. The persecution that Brother Nee suffered came almost entirely from Christianity.
First, many in Christianity despised him, even as a young man in his twenties. When Brother Nee was in his mid-twenties, he published the three volumes of The Spiritual Man. One top theologian commented that Brother Nee was merely a clever young man who could pick up many things by reading English books and translating them into Chinese. Brother Nee was really despised. Being criticized is not as serious as being despised. Criticism “circumcises” us and “cuts us into pieces,” but being despised is something more. Especially in those days, we were reminded of Hebrews 13:13: “Let us therefore go forth unto Him outside the camp, bearing His reproach.” Together with Brother Nee, we were going to the Lord outside the camp to bear His reproach. We considered that reproach as the cross. The more we were despised, the happier we were because we were bearing the cross.
Following being despised, Brother Nee was criticized by Christianity. He was criticized because he repudiated and renounced the entire unscriptural system of Christianity. In the twenty-four issues of his magazine The Christian, published in 1925 and 1926, Brother Nee “demolished” all of fallen Christianity. Some people today condemn me by saying that I am different from Watchman Nee. But what I have ministered cannot be compared in strength to what Brother Nee released to expose in detail the fallen situation of Christianity. Those in Christianity had to publish many things in criticism of him in order to defend themselves. I noticed that by being criticized, Brother Nee learned to deal with the flesh. He never reacted to criticism in a fleshly way. He learned the lesson of having his flesh dealt with.
In addition to suffering criticism, Brother Nee was opposed by Christianity. One Christian publication in China opposed him in issue after issue. Following this opposition, they attacked Brother Nee. They did their best to put him down. By that time China was a constitutional country with the freedom of religion. Otherwise, even Brother Nee’s life would have been in danger. The strongest attacks against him did not come from the native Christians but from the missionaries. The missionaries thought they had sacrificed their country, their homes, and so much for the Lord Jesus to go to a pagan country like China. They did this to help people be saved and to lay the foundation for and build up their mission churches. The Presbyterian missionaries built up the Presbyterian Church, and the Baptist missionaries built up the Baptist Church. They all built up their so-called churches. Some of them would collect the people they had converted together, take a picture of them, and send that picture back to the mission board so that they could receive some money in return.
Then a young man named Watchman Nee rose up to expose the error of denominationalism. By ministering the truth of the Word, he demolished the divisive standing of the denominational churches built up by the missionaries. He declared that the denominational churches were wrong and that there should only be the church in a locality. Brother Nee said that he appreciated the missionaries bringing the Bible, the name of Christ, and the gospel to China, but he also said that they should not have come to build up their mission churches. He said that all the divisive names should be put aside and that we should simply meet as the church, exalting only the name of Christ.
The circulation of his magazine The Christian went up to ten thousand subscriptions a month. Every month Brother Nee published ten thousand copies of this marvelous paper. This was why the missionaries attacked him so much. By being attacked, Brother Nee learned one lesson — to have his motive purified. He told me that when he was attacked by others, especially by the missionaries, he questioned himself. Since so many servants of the Lord attacked him, he considered that he might have been wrong. He appreciated that the missionaries had sacrificed so much to come to China to serve the Lord. By being attacked, he allowed himself to be checked by the Lord as to whether or not his motive was pure. He learned to deal with the Lord to be pure in motive.
One day he spoke to me concerning the purity of my motive. Whenever we were together, we never had loose talk or gossip. When he spoke to me concerning my motive, I believe he received the inspiration from the Lord to put me on the test. In the course of our fellowship, he suddenly asked me why I went to Hangchow. I was surprised and wondered why he asked me this since I had gone there a while before. I said, “I went there because I felt some of the brothers there needed my help. I went purposely to help them.” He replied frankly to me, “You are just a politician.” I told Brother Nee that I could not understand why he said this. I considered myself as a little servant who went there to serve the saints. How could he say that I was a politician? He replied, “Because you went to Hangchow with a purpose.” I said, “My purpose was not bad. My purpose was to go there to help the saints.” He said, “That is politics.”
After Brother Nee said this, I wondered how I could serve the Lord again. Eventually, he helped me to understand that if one is going to a place, he should not have any purpose. Why do we go to a place? We go because the Lord leads us there. The Lord leads us to go, so we have to go. I may not be so clear what to do there, but the Lord knows. Thus, I am not going in a political way but in a pure way. Why am I going to a certain place? I am going because of the Lord’s leading. What am I going to do there? I do not know, but He knows. This was a great lesson to me. I am still learning this lesson today. It is not easy to move in our service to the Lord without a purpose. Can we say that we move for the Lord without a purpose? According to Brother Nee, as long as you have a purpose, you are a politician. That was a hard lesson for me, but this helped me to always check my motive in my service. When we go somewhere, it should be because of the Lord’s initiation, not ours. We should just follow the Lord’s leading.
I received so much help from Brother Nee’s fellowship with me that day. He paid a great price to learn such lessons, and he passed them on to us. When we were under his training, we did not learn mere doctrines. He told us all the time not to pick up mere doctrines but to learn some spiritual lessons. He helped us to realize that when we minister a teaching, that teaching must be full of reality according to our experiences.
In addition to the attacks Brother Nee suffered, Christianity also spread rumors concerning him. Paul called these rumors an “evil report” in 2 Corinthians 6:8. The opposers did their best to defame Brother Nee. I would like to relate an illustration of the many false rumors concerning him. One day Miss Barber’s co-worker, Miss Gross, came to visit Brother Nee. By that time, Miss Barber had gone to the Lord, but Miss Gross still lived in Shanghai. She heard some rumors about Brother Nee, and she came to see him. Brother Nee was single at that time, and Miss Gross, along with Miss Barber, had helped him spiritually. Miss Gross had the position to rebuke him. She spoke to him in a rebuking tone and said, “I heard that you have a woman living with you.” Brother Nee answered, “Yes.” Then Miss Gross said unhappily, “How could you do such a thing?” She was very disappointed and left after a short time. As Brother Nee related this story to me, he said, “Witness, do you know who was staying with me? That woman was my mother. Because I was so sick, my mother came from a distance to take care of me. Then the rumor went out that I had a woman living with me. Yes, I did have a woman living with me.” Being bothered, I asked Brother Nee why he did not tell Miss Gross that his mother was staying with him. He said, “She didn’t ask me who the woman was.” Then he said, “Witness, we have to learn never to say anything to vindicate ourselves. We should just tell people the truth.” When Miss Gross confronted him by asking if a woman was living with him, all Brother Nee said was “yes.” He was learning the lesson not to vindicate himself, so he had to suffer the rebuking from Miss Gross. He said, “If she would have asked me who was living with me, I would have told her. But she did not ask, so I did not need to tell her. If I had told her, I would have been vindicating myself.”
This shows us how Brother Nee, through his sufferings, was a man who was always learning spiritual lessons from the Lord. I believe that in this century he became the most useful vessel in the Lord’s eyes. We have seen that in 1942 the enemy stirred up a big rebellion against him. Nearly all the co-workers and leading ones were against Brother Nee. There was a saying then that only “two and a half” persons among the co-workers and leading ones were not opposing him — one sister and “one and a half” brothers. I was the one brother of this “one and a half.” I told people that I did not care how much they told me Brother Nee was wrong. I could never forget the lessons I learned from him. I was with him day by day for a long period of time. I could never deny the solid things he learned and passed on to me. I did not care what others said about him. Some in Christianity said to me, “You are just following a man — Watchman Nee.” I said that it was a glory to me that I could have such a man from the Lord to follow.
Although there was so much opposition to Brother Nee within Christianity, there was also some vindication from the Lord. In 1938 and 1939 he was in England, and he was invited to the Keswick Convention, a gathering of Christians who were very much for the inner life. The chairman of the convention had heard something concerning Watchman Nee, so he asked Brother Nee to come up to the platform to give a prayer. In those days to be asked to be a speaker or to give a prayer at the Keswick Convention was a great thing. Brother Nee was hesitant about giving such a public prayer, but Brother T. Austin-Sparks, who had brought him to the convention, encouraged him to do it. Thus, Brother Nee went to the platform and prayed. His prayer taught the entire congregation. After his prayer, there was a message. After the message, however, no one talked about the message but about Watchman Nee’s prayer.
At that time Brother Nee was also able to have some real fellowship with the chairman of the convention, who was also the chairman of the best mission that went to China, the China Inland Mission. In their fellowship, this brother entirely agreed with Brother Nee. He told Brother Nee that what the Lord had commissioned him to do in China was according to Hudson Taylor’s burden. He was sorry that their missionaries had wrongly opposed Brother Nee. This brother later went to China purposely. He called all the China Inland Mission missionaries together to Shanghai and told them openly that they were wrong to oppose the ministry of Watchman Nee. He told them that what Brother Nee was doing was exactly what they should do. He also shared that because they had failed the Lord, the Lord raised up Brother Nee to replace them. He advised them and begged them not to oppose or attack Brother Nee anymore. Regretfully, after he left, the missionaries attacked Brother Nee even more.
From 1927, when Brother Nee established the church in Shanghai, until the day he died, he was only invited to speak to a denomination once. This was in 1932 in my hometown. He went there, and he stayed in my home. That was the first time we met. In one sense, he was very unpopular. In another sense, he was popular in being attacked by Christianity.
Today some publish Brother Nee’s books on the spiritual side of Christ being life to us, but they will not publish his material on the practical side concerning the church. Because the books concerning Christ as life have helped thousands, Brother Nee has a popular name today. But this was absolutely against his intention. He never would agree with this. For this reason we have done our best to publish Brother Nee’s fellowship concerning the church.
Some even spread a rumor that after World War II, Watchman Nee changed his concept concerning the church and the denominations, but the book entitled Further Talks on the Church Life disproves this. The messages in this book were all given by Brother Nee after the war. The earliest one was in 1948, and the last one was in 1951. These messages prove that Brother Nee never changed his concept. After the war I was working closely with him for at least two and a half years, and he told me what was on his heart. He said that we are not here just for Christ but for Christ and His Body, the church. He said that our vision is not just Christ as life but Christ as life for the church. He always ministered on Christ and the church. Many times in 1947 and 1948, he opened up his heart to me personally or to me and Sister Peace Wang, an elderly co-worker.
Some have also made the accusation that Witness Lee is different from Watchman Nee. One author accused me of going beyond Brother Nee by allegorizing the Bible. He accused me of going too far by saying in the book The Glorious Church that Eve is a type of the church. The author of this accusation, however, did not realize that The Glorious Church was written by Brother Nee. In his intention to show people that I was different from Brother Nee, in the Lord’s sovereignty, he made me the same as Brother Nee. Brother Nee’s ministry was always focused on Christ as life for the building up of the organic Body of Christ, and we have always continued in this focus.